Last four days were crazy busy, And if I am saying crazy I really mean it.I Had series of events one after other in last two days .
When I compare these days of my life with my early days I arrived to Canada 15 years back , My life has changed 360 degrees .When we came here, Soon after a small period of struggle we were settled.My husband got his field job and we rented out our first home.
I was blessed but lonely & depressed ,I missed everything about Pakistan even the things that no one supposed to miss, Like load shedding lol yes just because it made our whole family sit together and talk.I came from big joint family system both from my Mom’s side and my Husband’s home and even though I always used to think of having my own small peaceful place I wasn’t much happy being there.When I think about that time now, I realized there were many factors involved and when you are going through this no one tells you or guides you that once they were in a same boat and you will slowly find your way too.
There was no Youtube, Facebook or Whatsapp (actually no WiFi and smart phone).If you wanted to talk back home you have to use messengers or calling cards.Mississauga wasn’t dull but it was not like today.There were only few Desi restaurants.
Less knowledge and more hype about Halal and Haram stuff made our life a bit more frustrating .Most of the people around us were new and struggling so there were many negative vibes instead of motivation & encouragement .
I had no kids,I didn’t know how to drive.I didn’t know many people and when you are new even if you want to mingle its hard to find like minded friends, Also people are not always welcoming 🙁 .
Although I had many hobbies and I had done tons of arts and craft courses but I found everything very expensive here as compared to my country and it made me stop buying things.
When I saw highly qualified people doing odd jobs ,it made me sad and I didn’t think of going that way just to make myself busy .
I think this happens with every new immigrant and it is very normal.It’s not our problem, It is actually a problem of a mentality we bring with us from the society we brought up in,If you are immigrating to a new place for some goodness You need to leave it behind .if you are settling to a new place, Here are the few points to remember.
*You need to understand and accept the culture of new world you are in (Yes you have to ask before visiting anyone and call before showing up to someone’s house, Give space and get your own space,Believe me or not its good for you and Islamically appropriate as well).
*Sooner you stop thinking and comparing things here to back home sooner you will be settled to a new place(stop thinking about how many maids your sister in law has and here you are ending up cleaning your washrooms.You are privileged to live in first world country which has its own benefits and hopefully one day you will able to call a maid who will come in her luxury vehicle to clean your place so move on ).
*You need to stop converting the money for each and everything and stop trying to get everything from back home just because its cheaper there .It sometimes costs much more then usual, Bothers other people a lot( from all those who sweats in desi markets for your stuff, Those who dropped it to destination to those who carry your stuff from long way ,And even after that you ended up getting wrong things, Things that you don’t like at all and all this stuff make your small closets full)
*You have to accept that no job is small and there is nothing wrong in doing an odd job while trying to get into your field, Actually it helps you to survive or earn extra income,Keeps you busy and protects you from negative vibes.
*You have to understand the ways and routes of new place and if you can manage,First thing you should go for is your driver’s license .
*Get involve in volunteer work to make yourself busy, whether its a school, hospital or a library .It won’t pay you money but it opens lots of doors for you to get connected with people ,to understand norms of society ,Improves your language and communication skills and sometimes helps to get a real job.
*Praise the weather,Yes Winter days are gloomy but your complaining cannot fix it ,So try to beat the winter blues. April showers bring May flowers and then things start getting better.There will be cherry blossoms and there will be Tulips.Soft breeze will touch you soon and then summer will bloom,Days will be full of energy and you can enjoy lake site BBQs and long walks.And when it will make you tired Fall will start singing beautiful melodies and there will be colours colours everywhere(Oh Canada I love your moods! ).
*Last but not the least and actually most important thing is to get along with right people, Find positive friends and company ,keep yourself away from people who are always complaining and crying as their company will suck all your positive energy, demotivate you and leave you with stress for no reason.
The key is to stay positive, Keep yourself busy ,Stop seeing back, Stop comparing & move forward.And later in life when you meet some new immigrants,Feeling down, homesick and sad ,Cheer them with welcoming attitude and tell them you were there too and They will find their way and then everything will be alright as Canada is a peaceful and beautiful place ❤️
🇨🇦Happy Canada Day 🇨🇦
Quratul ain Saba
#khayalbysaba
When I compare these days of my life with my early days I arrived to Canada 15 years back , My life has changed 360 degrees .When we came here, Soon after a small period of struggle we were settled.My husband got his field job and we rented out our first home.
I was blessed but lonely & depressed ,I missed everything about Pakistan even the things that no one supposed to miss, Like load shedding lol yes just because it made our whole family sit together and talk.I came from big joint family system both from my Mom’s side and my Husband’s home and even though I always used to think of having my own small peaceful place I wasn’t much happy being there.When I think about that time now, I realized there were many factors involved and when you are going through this no one tells you or guides you that once they were in a same boat and you will slowly find your way too.
There was no Youtube, Facebook or Whatsapp (actually no WiFi and smart phone).If you wanted to talk back home you have to use messengers or calling cards.Mississauga wasn’t dull but it was not like today.There were only few Desi restaurants.
Less knowledge and more hype about Halal and Haram stuff made our life a bit more frustrating .Most of the people around us were new and struggling so there were many negative vibes instead of motivation & encouragement .
I had no kids,I didn’t know how to drive.I didn’t know many people and when you are new even if you want to mingle its hard to find like minded friends, Also people are not always welcoming 🙁 .
Although I had many hobbies and I had done tons of arts and craft courses but I found everything very expensive here as compared to my country and it made me stop buying things.
When I saw highly qualified people doing odd jobs ,it made me sad and I didn’t think of going that way just to make myself busy .
I think this happens with every new immigrant and it is very normal.It’s not our problem, It is actually a problem of a mentality we bring with us from the society we brought up in,If you are immigrating to a new place for some goodness You need to leave it behind .if you are settling to a new place, Here are the few points to remember.
*You need to understand and accept the culture of new world you are in (Yes you have to ask before visiting anyone and call before showing up to someone’s house, Give space and get your own space,Believe me or not its good for you and Islamically appropriate as well).
*Sooner you stop thinking and comparing things here to back home sooner you will be settled to a new place(stop thinking about how many maids your sister in law has and here you are ending up cleaning your washrooms.You are privileged to live in first world country which has its own benefits and hopefully one day you will able to call a maid who will come in her luxury vehicle to clean your place so move on ).
*You need to stop converting the money for each and everything and stop trying to get everything from back home just because its cheaper there .It sometimes costs much more then usual, Bothers other people a lot( from all those who sweats in desi markets for your stuff, Those who dropped it to destination to those who carry your stuff from long way ,And even after that you ended up getting wrong things, Things that you don’t like at all and all this stuff make your small closets full)
*You have to accept that no job is small and there is nothing wrong in doing an odd job while trying to get into your field, Actually it helps you to survive or earn extra income,Keeps you busy and protects you from negative vibes.
*You have to understand the ways and routes of new place and if you can manage,First thing you should go for is your driver’s license .
*Get involve in volunteer work to make yourself busy, whether its a school, hospital or a library .It won’t pay you money but it opens lots of doors for you to get connected with people ,to understand norms of society ,Improves your language and communication skills and sometimes helps to get a real job.
*Praise the weather,Yes Winter days are gloomy but your complaining cannot fix it ,So try to beat the winter blues. April showers bring May flowers and then things start getting better.There will be cherry blossoms and there will be Tulips.Soft breeze will touch you soon and then summer will bloom,Days will be full of energy and you can enjoy lake site BBQs and long walks.And when it will make you tired Fall will start singing beautiful melodies and there will be colours colours everywhere(Oh Canada I love your moods! ).
*Last but not the least and actually most important thing is to get along with right people, Find positive friends and company ,keep yourself away from people who are always complaining and crying as their company will suck all your positive energy, demotivate you and leave you with stress for no reason.
The key is to stay positive, Keep yourself busy ,Stop seeing back, Stop comparing & move forward.And later in life when you meet some new immigrants,Feeling down, homesick and sad ,Cheer them with welcoming attitude and tell them you were there too and They will find their way and then everything will be alright as Canada is a peaceful and beautiful place ❤️
🇨🇦Happy Canada Day 🇨🇦
Quratul ain Saba
#khayalbysaba
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